Thursday, March 1, 2012

The Jimpire Strikes Back

Say it ain't so! Some good Metro news?

Just when you thought the Teflon Death Star had won the day, along comes a friggin' U.S. congressman to get all Jedi master on Metro and their evil empire.

The force has gotta be strong in this one to be so brave, so bold.

Who is this Luke Skywalker, this Obi-Wan of the rails? It's none other than Jim Moran (D-Va.). (How cool is it that he's my congressman to boot! Swoon...)

Given his widely reported bellicose demeanor, this Moran-Metro showdown is gonna be good, and better yet, Metro's got no chance against this Irish toughie.

Besides, it’s about time a local politician pulled out from behind riders and instead led the rebellion to make Metro better for their constituents!

Finally, someone with some guts stood up and wrote a strongly worded letter (PDF) to Metro’s GM Richard Palpatine, I mean Sarles, demanding action. That's right, immediate action!

At last, someone who can make a difference has entered the fray, blasters a blazin'.

You go Jim!

So what’s got the august congressman from Virginia so hot under the light sabre?

Broken escalators? Mismanagement? Waste? Rude Metro employees? The union not paying a dime toward their pension? Cronyism? Zero transparency? Mystery dust at Court House? Fishy brakes? Omnipresent delays and offloads? Thieving Metro employees? Bad brakes? Lack of safety? Lack of oversight? Dan Stessel’s indefensible stance on sexual harassment? Fare hikes? That essential oil salesman?

It’s gotta be something big, something absolutely vital to Metro's daily operation to get this congressman this mad.

Drum roll...

Courtesy Blue Virginia

Sad trombone sound

Alas, Jim’s got his panties in a bunch about an ad--an ad at the Clarendon Metro station.

Of all the things wrong with Metro, this is where Jimbo wants to draw a line in the sand? An ad?

We. Are. So. Screwed.

I appreciate Jimmy's passion for funding Metro, but nowhere on his website is there anything about Metro's lack of accountability. Not a word.

Moran's advocacy style of more no-strings money and less accountability has worked out so well!

But back to the ad. Agree with it or not, like it or not, think it's in good taste or not (for the record, I don't think it is.), there’s nothing Metro can do about it if. At least that's what their chief flack Dan Stessel tweeted. Maybe Moran should have done a little googling before making such a quixotic stink.

And really, does this ad influence anyone other than a few morbidly curious who now might actually watch the "Sick and Sicker" "documentary" because of the "controversy" swirling around it?

Sadly, with this media attention, those who bought the ad must be laughing all the way to the bank (piggy).

I'm just thankful there are still people stupid enough to buy a Metro ad. I was tired of all the rider-funded Metroforward ads, and at least this ad might shave a few pennies off those inevitable fare hikes.

And lastly, if you're as irate as Moran, pull together some money and tell anyone you want to go to hell.

If you do, I beg you, start with Metro.

Here are the details on how (PDF).

As a footnote, Metro is taking a beating on this on Twitter, but they have yet to tweet that they are apparently legally bound to keep the ad up. Another PR fail for taking unnecessary heat.

Other items:
Metro crime rate tops other transit systems (Examiner)
Metro fails to report homicides-again (Examiner)
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