Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Hire Morgan Freeman?

That Metro often looks for the gimmicky solution to problems is an established fact, so this suggestion from reader BT doesn't seem too far fetched:

The other morning on the Orange Line, our conductor's voice had an uncanny resemblance to Morgan Freeman's.

I couldn't help but daydream as we sat between stations for five minutes how awesome it would be if Morgan Freeman did indeed do the announcements for the Metro.

He's known for the seductive powers of his narrative prowess - the man could tame a charging rhino by simply opening his mouth.

How much easier would it be to cope with egregious rush hour delays if Mr. Freeman's soothing voice uttered "I wish I could tell you that the Metro fought the good fight, and that you all were going to arrive to work on time today. I wish I could tell you that ... but the Metro is no fairytale world ..."?

Announcements that would, at other times, have us clawing at the walls in anger and frustration would instead result in collective sighs of appreciation. It makes sense.

Metro, you're already notorious for your illogical and shortsighted decisions to "improve" the system. Surely hiring Morgan Freeman to make Metro announcements isn't completely out of the realm of possibility. Make it happen. I, for one, would certainly look forward to some "Metro Center Redemption" in the near future.

Other items:
Federal funding a step closer (WaPo)
Commuting in the DC area sucks (Examiner)
Cutting service appears likely to balance budget (GGW)

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Erika said...

I've totally had that Metro driver! My friends and I were thinking that Morgan Freeman was doing some role research or something and driving our train. Love the Morgan Freeman operator.

andywhitedc said...

Pretty much every other metro system has automated annoucements that are clear and concise. This would not fly on the DC jobs program otherwise known as metro drivers. They currently have two responsibilities: close doors and mumble into the mic. How could they justify their six figure salaries for just closing doors?!

Anonymous said...

hahah amazing post! Keep 'em coming BT!

McLaura said...

Haha...I've definitely been on Morgan's train a few times.

Anonymous said...

Obligatory XKCD: http://xkcd.com/462/

And I too have been on Morgan's train.

Anonymous said...

Morgan Freeman used to drive my morning Blue Line trains - enjoy him on the Orange!

Dan Franzen said...

It'd be nice if Mr. Freeman would do it for free..

Anonymous said...

I used to hear Morgan Freeman all the time when I rode the yellow/blue lines frequently. I loved his voice!

Anonymous said...

He has such a soothing voice... Would make everyone a little happier to be on the Metro!

P.S. Great post!

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